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Wednesday, March 28, 2012

How to Flirt while in a Relationship

Because I'm so nice and kind and I love to help people I've decided to share this invaluable information. Ladies you can eat your cake and have (some of) it... Notice I said ladies, guys shooo away... No i'm serious close this page. Ladies where were we? So this invaluable information.... by the way single ladies are very welcome, we are one big estrogenous family- Please don't ask.

OK here is a scenario - You have been dating a lovely person for a while, this person is all that and a bag of gummi worms except of course when said person is hungry or just being a general brat. Anyways you like said person a lot or maybe even love and have eyes only for your boo. Well Sort of...

You're out and about and you spot a hottie and for a second you think "Damn why am I in a relationship?" (It's OK you can confess, I promise I won't tell, you are not a horrible girlfriend) Of course you aren't going to write your name and number on a paper napkin and sultrily slip it to him. Come one even when you were single you didn't have such guts Here is what you do... My friend Khafil thinks I'm uncool, whatever. You're a Loser too.


BAIT and WAIT. Extremely cool right? Yes. You've probably unconsciously done this before... or not

STEP 1: You bait said hottie, however you best know how, I'm rather subtle so a few glances and a small smile, some of you come on strong if it backfires please don't call me, actually if any of this backfires I dont know you You can ask the time, borrow a pen, whatever the situation allows. A few words are allowed like;
"When will this flight ever leave?" - OK this kinda sucks
Not too many words like;
"Wow! you and Adam Levine have the same bone structure, a firm jaw that I find very attractive in a Hot man such as yourself" - Even when you are thinking it, DO NOT SAY THIS.

STEP 2: WAIT. This is the hard part, wait for hottie to take the bait, respond. Chill and do not bait again. I repeat, do not bait again, lose all interest immediately! ABORT! Ok not that serious. After this point if you get a response, you can have a nice chat, refuse to give out your number or whatever and go home to your boo. Fin. Win.

Or he can give you Ela (Non-Nigerian readers this means to be ignored or generally shot-down, mostly the latter) and you still go home to your boo. Win.

Advisory note: Do not use the technique described above without consulting your common sense. The Writer and Editor of La bella imperfezione will not be held liable for any negative consequences such as; Break-ups, Emotional distress and trauma.

Love always,
Sabirah.

4 comments:

  1. Haha lol fun things! Ur disclaimer shd also include do not try this while you're mad @ the boo or you guys jst had a fight, cos temptation gets real sometimes (happened to me and I derailed)

    But yeah a lirru flirting shd nt hurt nobody and sometimes its a good reminder that ur "market is still hot" and so ur boyfriend/girlfriend shd not get too comfy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes great point! i will just file that under "common sense" if someone tries to sue me.

      hahaha at market still hot!!

      Delete

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Love, Sabirah.

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