How to Flirt while in a Relationship

Because I'm so nice and kind and I love to help people I've decided to share this invaluable information. Ladies you can eat your cake and have (some of) it... Notice I said ladies, guys shooo away... No i'm serious close this page. Ladies where were we? So this invaluable information.... by the way single ladies are very welcome, we are one big estrogenous family- Please don't ask.

OK here is a scenario - You have been dating a lovely person for a while, this person is all that and a bag of gummi worms except of course when said person is hungry or just being a general brat. Anyways you like said person a lot or maybe even love and have eyes only for your boo. Well Sort of...

You're out and about and you spot a hottie and for a second you think "Damn why am I in a relationship?" (It's OK you can confess, I promise I won't tell, you are not a horrible girlfriend) Of course you aren't going to write your name and number on a paper napkin and sultrily slip it to him. Come one even when you were single you didn't have such guts Here is what you do... My friend Khafil thinks I'm uncool, whatever. You're a Loser too.

BAIT and WAIT. Extremely cool right? Yes. You've probably unconsciously done this before... or not

STEP 1: You bait said hottie, however you best know how, I'm rather subtle so a few glances and a small smile, some of you come on strong if it backfires please don't call me, actually if any of this backfires I dont know you You can ask the time, borrow a pen, whatever the situation allows. A few words are allowed like;

"When will this flight ever leave?" - OK this kinda sucks

Not too many words like;

"Wow! you and Adam Levine have the same bone structure, a firm jaw that I find very attractive in a Hot man such as yourself" - Even when you are thinking it, DO NOT SAY THIS.

STEP 2: WAIT. This is the hard part, wait for hottie to take the bait, respond. Chill and do not bait again. I repeat, do not bait again, lose all interest immediately! ABORT! Ok not that serious. After this point if you get a response, you can have a nice chat, refuse to give out your number or whatever and go home to your boo. Fin. Win.

Or he can give you Ela (Non-Nigerian readers this means to be ignored or generally shot-down, mostly the latter) and you still go home to your boo. Win.

Advisory note: Do not use the technique described above without consulting your common sense. The Writer and Editor of La bella imperfezione will not be held liable for any negative consequences such as; Break-ups, Emotional distress and trauma.

Love always,

Sabirah.

Thursday Tidbits

1. Thank God it's Thursday!whoooop. I like thursdays
2. I went to toastmasters today, it was such much fun! I really enjoy the company of my older friends! They are hilarious.
3. Remember the Dr and his wife? The cute couple? Remember I said they were min 50's ish! How wrong, they are both over 60!! amazing bodies, speech, fashion sense, errrrthaaaang. Like wow. Guess how long they've known each other? Since they were born!! they were childhood neighbors :')
4. I made up a word today "Sustainable love" love that lasts. Sure we like (well I like) the dizziness that romance brings but will it all last? What makes love sustainable?
5. I'm writing a post on my teaching experience so far and I keep deleting it because so many people know the school and I don't want to slander but I want to be honest. Does that make sense? What do I do?
6. The diet is going well. I cheated yesterday, with a few spoonfuls of delicious beans and sweet corn, then my stomach hurt a bit, and for most of today it's been hurting. Serves me right! *blowing raspberries at self*
7. I've been seeing pregnant women eeeeverywhere!! They are following me! Pregnant women are haunting me saying look at my fertilized eggs hahahahha :( I wish they would stop :(
8. I can't hold a grudge, it eats at me till I pretty much grovel and beg the person whether or not i'm at fault. This can be a problem. I opened a jar of nutella yesterday to console myself, realised I couldn't eat it cos of the diet, started crying and then caught sight of myself in the mirror and started laughing! I have the ugliest crying face ever.
9. I then tweeted till I fell asleep I am thankful for my boring drama free life

Have a fantastic Friday and weekend!

Love,

Sab.

A loss of Sorts

It's been a week since I last blogged shame on me.

My internet expired and since I'm a poor lowly teacher with no salary.... OK this is just an excuse, I ignore. I apologise for being a lazy blogger.

Anyways howdy and all that, hope you're well. (did I just type howdy?)

You know, living in Lagos is stressful; imagine something stressful... now multiply by 10, add heat and then add a good serving of disgruntled government workers. Luckily for me my state of mind helps me combat stress, I try to stay cool but the disgruntled government workers are a necessary evil. OK I shouldn't call them evil, some of them are my family members and maybe yours too. They probably have a lot to be unhappy about;  late salaries and the like, but we all live in Lagos and know how horrible it is, if we were a bit pleasant to one another maybe life would be a little better no?

Anyways I had to get my Nigerian passport renewed so I had to come in contact with these evil people, apart from being unbearably hot and everything being slow and people yelling at me "GO AND MAKE PHOTOCOPY" everything was going at snail pace smoothly. I came prepared, I had a book, I waited my turn even as they loaded other's files on top of mine, I was patient, like a good girl.

My turn came and I went to the photo area, pulled my hair back and smiled. *snap* that was easy... being  good girl pays. NOT!
"Madam, remove that earring!"- she yelled at me
"Erm I can't... it's it's.." I stuttered
"Why???" she bellowed
"Erm because it has a screw and.." I continued
"MADAM GET UP! GET UP! TAKE YOUR FILE AND LEAVE THIS PLACE" She yelled.
There are few things I hate more that being yelled at, tears formed in the back of my eyes as I picked up the rest of my dignity and walked out. I went to the car and removed my industrial piercing, over four years... I thought nothing as I walked back in and finished the passport process. Witch Lady had gone to lunch.

August 16th 2007 few days after I got it.

Fast forward to evening as I undressed to go to bed, I looked at my ears and freaked out.
My chest was literally hurting. I felt a deep sense of loss, I also knew that too many hours had gone by and putting it back in would be excruciating.
My mum said "Start of a new era, you're no longer a teenager"
Why do I still feel the dull ache in my chest?
Have you ever lost something you thought you wouldn't miss?

  

Creative License

On Christmas day last year I was out in the evening with a couple of people. I was dancing on my own to Fela (I couldn't resist), I got into conversation with a guy about my obvious love for Fela and Art in general, as we talked on and on about different art forms he finally asked "So since you like the arts so much, how do you express your self creatively?" I froze for a second because I didn't have a definite answer, "erm I like to dance, I write some poetry but I don't show anyone, I make jewellery sometimes too, I cook very well, and DIY a lot errr" I rambled on. I was glad when we changed subjects.

At the time my thought was how can I call myself a creative person when I don't have a definite creative outlet? What does it mean to even be creative? I began to ask myself these questions and realized that little everyday things matter. Even more than the big stuff. In conjunction with gathering inspiration from many different sources, I find myself expressing myself in things like the way I dress, my mum always jokes that "Why won't people ask if you're Nigerian?" , the way I style my hair, the way I cook, This blog, how I wear make up, how I paint my nails. Little drops make an ocean yes?

It's one of the reasons I decided that I wanted to be a teacher, main reason I wanted to do something fulfilling in which I was actively positively impacting young minds.  I wanted to be i an environment that was constantly changing and creatively charged. Unfortunately I haven't had much of a chance to be really creative, when a school has a set way they do things nobody wants change, especially from a 22 year old who knows "nothing" sigh. slowly but surely I hope.

Anyways that's my rant about giving yourself creative license.

So tell me, how do you express yourself creatively?

Love and creativity,
Sab.

Thursday Tidbits

1. It's thursdaaay yaaay
2. Toastmasters meeting today yaay
3. Yesterday I ate one of my diets forbidden foods :( X_X and I confessed to my mum... tiny slip up but I'm back up
4. I have so many Book reviews to put up but I always end up writing too much- like an analysis... someone teach me ahhhhhh
5. One of my favorite places in Lagos recently moved closer to me! whoop whoop!
6. I was feeling creatively stagnant on tuesday but i'm waay better now. notice how much I've been blogging?
7. I miss my friends :( everyone is so busy
8. I adore the partner. 

Cheers to the weekend!

love, Sab

Out and About in Lagos

I'm really missing not having a camera :( I love to take pictures of new places, food, events everything, just for my personal records. Plus it's fun and I like photos. Anyways thankfully sometimes my friends are kind enough to send me their photos :) "friends" being most likely the man behind http://imperialmedia.shutterchance.com/ <---- check it out!! Anyways here goes some photos :)

Felabration (last year) - An annual event to honor the Legendary Fela Anikulapo Kuti (if you know anything about me you know I'm a FAN)

So after uploading these photos I realized all the others from felabration would be inappropriate and unfair to the people I went with. lol Enjoy that beautiful sax though my fave afrobeat instrument.

Chef Fregz Special (last year): I had a really good time with my girl Simi who I miss sooo much! The food was delicious, I was surrounded by friends, conversation and laughter! Good day in all.

Simi and I, stunna shades on B)

nom

nom nom

nom nom nom

Tola and I

Simi is a happy camper!

Next installment coming up soon :)
Love and happiness,
Sabirah.

So far...

It is day two of my diet, 10:20am and I'm thankful.
My mum decided to join me so yesterday, in the morning we went on our brisk 20minute walk, came back home and made our prescribed foods, and started drinking tea, now if you know me you already know I love tea, but since I moved to Nigeria my drinking of tea has reduced. I'm glad to say it is back up. No sugar though. Plain tea with non fat milk or just plain tea. I'm enjoying it.

Yesterday was a test in discipline as I made dinner for the partner. I didn't even taste it. As I served his plate I thought, I wonder when we'll eat together again? Thankfully he is very supportive and didn't taunt me with his food lol. I'm on the attack phase of the Dukan diet and it's really specific and restricted, it will last for a week and then the new phase will kick in. Can't wait!

I'm glad to say it's not been too hard, maybe it's too early to speak but hey, my will power is still going strong. This morning went on my brisk walk at 6:00am with mum, will power still going strong, got dressed and filled a thermos flask with my tea, and a thermos mug with some more tea. Packed my lunch and headed to work. It's going to be a good day.

I'm so glad my mum is doing this with me ^_^ her and the partner are awesome! My support group :)
Thinking of doing weekly weigh-ins... should I bother? might be a good way to keep myself accountable? let me know in the comments please!

Just a quick update!!
have a great day, Love,
Sab.

Cant wait to have a tub like this.
Have a great weekend everyone and don't forget to rest
Love,
Sab.