Thursday Tidbits

1. Happy thanksgiving to all my "Americans" It was always such a great time for me when I lived in the states.
2. Spent all of yesterday on my mum's friend's organic farm! It was ammmmaazing (pictures up soonish)
3. Related to the above I have been eating the most luscious fruits and veggies all day! I could live like this forever ever ever.
4. I have really few friends in Lagos, it was rather shocking because at a point in my life all my friends were here. Life changes, people move, grow apart etc. and I'm learning to be OK with that.
5. Remember the man I was attracted to in this post ? Meeeh.. I saw him today and figured it out, it was his voice. No longer attracted.
6. Remember the tailor I was hoping on from last post? She was aiit. A tad expensive for me sha, the search continues
7. I went to Covenant University on Tuesday and was really impressed by the campus and facilities. Really nice and beautiful too!
8. My mum and I are such good friends I can't bear the thought of living apart again :(
9. Cant wait for my friend Simi to be in Lagos. Fun times ahead!

Have an amazing weekend y'all :)

Love always,

Sabirah

Thursday Tidbits (late)

Late again, sorry! Nigerian factor.

1. It was our anniversary yesterday! :D
2. Saw Nigerian movie "Hood rush" great acting & story line although the singing was a bit much at times, I really enjoyed it
3. I wish the hood rush theatre was as full as the sky fall one...
4. What are we really going to do about Nigerian men peeing in public, It's so disgusting it's unbelievable, I've started taking my phone out pretending to take a picture. hahaha. Shames them quickly.
5. My mum commended me on my "faith" this morning, saying she needs to learn from me. Really warmed my heart.
6. I'm going to pick up my clothes from a new tailor today, fingers crossed. I hope she is the ONE. the search for a good tailor is reeeeal.
7. Cooking really makes me happy. Finally decided to do something about my lethargy and creative rut. Cook something new every wednesday when my friend Suyi is visiting. 
8. Everyone loved the creamy pasta dish I made. My mum who wasn't interested came back for seconds!
9. Ugh I haaaaate Nigerian salons, the have NO clue bout natural hair, back to doing my hair myself. My mum did some sexy all back for me last night. (whose mum still does their hair? lol :D)

Have an amazing weekend everyone!

Love always,

Sabirah

Girl Talk

(fine, boys you can stay too)

The other day I was thinking of how important it is to be able to talk about sex on a real level with other girls/women. I think it's essential to have that one person/people that you can talk to freely whether you are having sex or not, maybe you're curious, you're considering it soon, "saving" it till your wedding night or celibate. It's nice to have someone you can ask questions whether or not they have answers or just voice out your concerns without judgement. While reading cosmo might answer some questions, I've found that most of the information there is... well fluff.

A bit of background; as close as I am to my mother, sex wasn't just the kind of topic we got into. I think I was about 10 years old when I first got the whole "sex is for grown ups" talk. The next one happened when I got my period, I think I was about 12, the short version was "you are now a big girl, if a boy touches you, you can have a baby". And I was like ugh, this is all so gross and why would I let a boy touch me anyways.

Lot's of things I didn't know. 

1. That this "touching" was sex
2. That I would develop a "desire" to be "touched"
3. That people enjoyed the "touching"

So fast forward to senior secondary school, the rumors and stories were flying around, "bad girls" were letting boys touch them. I really couldn't understand why girls would get into so much trouble just for that in my head they were stupid. Let me be clear though, I was talking to boys and all but it was more of just enjoying attention than anything else.

My first "real talk" about sex was with my uncle's wife, I was about 14 and was on her bridal train. On the night before the wedding my friend and I were in her room and she was packing her honeymoon suitcase. She started showing us all her lingerie etc and I was so embarrassed and flustered, so she told us (my friend and  I) that she and my uncle were going to have sex and enjoy it O_O, showed us her edible panties etc and I was just like woooah. Fun night, she is still my favorite aunt.

Then college came around, I honestly can't remember exactly when but all of a sudden I was interested in boys in a different kind if way, of course by now I knew (what I thought was a lot) about sex and I had a boyfriend and I wanted to talk about it with him all the time (hahaha thank God we were long distance). I had all these questions and I was so lucky to have friends, my ( understanding albeit frustrated) boyfriend and the above aunt to have real talk with.

These conversations shaped a lot of my thoughts on sex and physical intimacy and made me really confident about the choices I made concerning my body. I think it's so important for ladies to have spaces where we can have open conversations like these, without discriminating against the sexually active, virgin, re-virginated (lol this always makes me giggle)/celibate and so on. No matter where you stand on that scale you deserve to have people you can trust enough to ask what you want/need to know

So questions for you; How did you find out about sex, who did you ask? What were your sources of information? What do you wish you had known earlier? Still have doubts and questions?

I know this is kind of a different topic for this blog but I usually write as it comes so...

As always, Love.
Sabirah.

p.s feel free to share and comment, would be nice to get a conversation going.

Thankful.

In the past two months a lot of things have not worked out exactly as planned. I was disappointed a few times and felt a bit helpless. It just seemed like my perfect plan was falling to pieces.

At the same time I tried to remain hopeful and believe that God was working things out in my favor as he promised, because he knows exactly what is best for me.

I just want to write this quick post to say I'm thankful. I'm happier than I've been in a long time and I can attribute that to being surrounded by loving family and friends. I know that even though some things didn't work out exactly as planned, God is always working behind the scenes and making the best decisions for us.

I'm really thankful for the amazing people God puts in my life, I can't say it enough but I am surrounded by the absolute best people here and thousands of miles away and sometimes I forget how much of a blessing that is.

I'm happy and so thankful.

It's November already and I'm praying that things only get better. Remember to focus on the good in your life, even if one thing isn't working out as you wanted, trust that God is there and there are many other things that ARE working out (and usually far more important than what we worry about)


Love always,
Happy Sunday!
Sabirah

Thursday Tidbits.

Woooohoooo, the irony of a jobless person celebrating thursday *shrug*

1. Mahn I've been battling a sore throat, severe allergies and some sinus pressure for like 3 days. It is not funny.
2. I went to the market today, as in Lagos Island. It's always interesting yet stressful sigh.
3. I am not ready. Everyday I see another sign that I am not ready. Sheesh... Ready for marriage and or children I mean.
4. But really is anybody ever really "ready" in the true sense of the word?
5. Anybody that tells you a relationship isn't work is a liar oh. Look them in the eyes with tears running down your face and say "Whhhhhyyyy, why do you lie to me so"
6. Unrelated to the above I might have a future in acting
7. But really, that's why it's so important to find who is worth the work. Dear Sabirah's Partner, you are so worth the work ( I know you read :p)
8. My mum just called the channel Africa Magic, "African Madness" pretty apt freudian slip! LMAO
9. Thanks to everyone who responded in detail to my last Thursday Tidbit, thanks for all the assurance and just adding your voice to the conversation, it's not too late if you haven't and you want to. Also thank you for reading and sharing with your friend's. Be blessed!

Love always,

Sabirah

Freedom Park

Two weeks ago on a Saturday evening, three girls decided to wander around Lagos Island just for the fun of it... via keke napep (a motorzed tuk tuk)- if you've never been in one you have to try it! it's exhilarating, at least I found it so.

Lagos Island was relatively calm so getting around was easy. Funlola suggested Freedom park as she had seen it and wondered what it was about. Many thanks to our Keke-napep driver Kenny who also sometimes served as our driver and was quite funny. Definitely loved his spirit!

Freedom park is built on the site of a former prison. The prison was built in 1872, and Obafemi Awolowo was once imprisoned here. Although nothing remains of the former prison structures (it was demolished by a developer in the 70's), the designer and architect Theo Lawson wanted it to retain some of it's history and built some cells with low walls to give an idea of what a prison cell looked like at the time.

I absolutely love the idea of creating something new and fresh but not forgetting history. Freedom park is beautiful and I see myself visiting often either to just lounge in the beautiful park or maybe attend a concert

 It was a fun day doing what I love, exploring, learning and enjoying what this city has to offer. Thank God for friends who love adventure :).

Visit their website here http://freedomparklagos.com/

Any places I should be visiting next?

Love always,
Sabirah

Thursday Tidbits (Late)

So it's actually Friday but please pardon me, the electricity situation in Lagos has been really terrible, even right now there is no power. Sigh.

1. What would it really take to solve Nigeria's power problem?
2. Why wasn't there more concern about the flooding in Nigeria. I mean I heard sooooo much more about Hurricane Sandy, why don't we care for our own? 1.4 million people were DISPLACED in the recent floods in Nigeria that affected 30 out of our 36 states. I mean is it just a case of bad journalism or maybe we too have come to view things from a US-centric angle?
3. Things are bad. And it's scary...
4. Apparently in 2014, Legally Nigeria will no longer be "Nigeria" and can be split. What does this even mean?
5. How much can your environment hamper your creativity and your will to just DO
6. What is REALLY Important?
7. How does a young creative person create a Legal source of income :s 
8. How do I shake off this Lethargy?
9. Again What is really important?

Different Format today, Loads of questions swimming in my head. If you have answers, have at it. :)

Have a pleasant weekend.

Love always,

Sabirah